I can’t even believe I’m alive after these last 10 years!
No, I’m kidding.
Really though,10 years went by already?!
Every year, you see all over social media the phrase “New Year, New me!” It never fails, I always read it the first day of January.
However, what does that phrase really mean to you?
I am going to put into perspective what that phrase truly means to me this year.
The last ten years of my life has been a life alternating experience.
Take that literal now, because my life has altered in more ways than I’d like to admit.
Over the last 10 Years , I have lost myself completely and found myself at the same time.
I have been at the darkest I have ever been, while also being at the highest of all my highs.
I have endured 3 child births that have resulted in 3 beautiful, healthy human beings that bring me nothing but joy on my dim days.
I have gained new best friends and I have lost best friends.
I have been married, divorced, and remarried.
I have shifted out of my comfort zone with no intentions of ever turning back.
I have faced some of my biggest fears and conquered them like you wouldn’t believe.
I have had my heart shattered into a million pieces and I have had it put back together as a whole.
I have learned how to stand my ground and not back down from ANY giant.
I have learned lessons that I will be able to teach my grandchildren some day.
The last 10 years have been years that I never want to forget, due to the fact they molded me into the woman I am today, however, these next 10 years will be the best years of my life.
So, when I say “New Year, New me!”
Im talking on a whole other level this year.
My mindset has changed.
I am a new version of myself.
I still love long walks on the beach, the touch of my husbands hand on my thigh in the car , my son‘s hugs, my toddler‘s sweet kisses, my newborn‘s chubby cheeks, Greys Anatomy, Target trips, and sweet iced tea, But I’ve just grown in more ways than I can even fathom.
Ive grown into someone I adore.
Coming forth into the new decade, I shall continue to grow.
Im not going to set small resolutions that dwindle away over time.
Im going to love myself.
Im going to reward myself.
Im going to stand up for myself.
Im going to put my mental health first.
Im going to forgive myself.
Forgiving yourself is one of the toughest elements you need to do for yourself.
Im going to forgive myself for thinking I’m not enough.
Im going to forgive myself for thinking my kids are better off without me.
Im gonna forgive myself for dwelling on the past.
Im gonna forgive myself for feeling guilty about working to provide for my kids.
I am going to forgive myself for feeling guilty about staying home while my husband works.
Im going to forgive myself for allowing a situation to control my life for so long, whereas, most of all, I’m going to forgive myself for blocking my own blessings from arriving sooner.
YOU are the only person who can block your blessings.
Yep, I said it.
Its US people, It’s all of us.
We have the tendency to block our own blessings by allowing certain situations in our lives to control our peace and happiness.
Well, you know what?
NOT THIS YEAR,SATAN.
This year, I refuse to allow Satan into my mind, body , or spirit.
This year, I’m turning over a new leaf.
I’m going to step even more out of my comfort zone and learn new tasks to the best of my ability.
This year, I’m speaking positivity into life.
I‘m speaking peacefulness into existence.
I‘m setting goals and I’m achieving them.
I’m not making excuses, I’m making commitments.
I’m making a commitment to love myself, while also loving my husband, and my kids unconditionally.
I’m making a commitment to speak kind words to my kids and to my peers.
I’m making a commitment to not allow my custody battle and parallel parenting to control my emotions.
I’m making a commitment to continue fighting for my son and for my rights to have him equally.
I’m keeping my mind open and my words soft spoken.
This is the year.
This is the year that was made for me to shine.
All in all, the next ten years will be full of new ventures, projects, and blessings on blessings on blessings!
So, when you hear me say “New Year. New me” , just know that I’m not being cliche, I’m being superior.
Happy New Year, folks!